Finale - Arsenal Christmas Carol part five

Mr Wenger leapt out of his bed and flung his window open. He leaned out and saw Theo Walcott skipping down the street. "Young Theo, what day is this?" He asked. "Why sir, 'tis Christmas day!" Theo exclaimed. Mr Wenger thought of all the things the spirits had shown him as he looked down at Theo's happy little face. "Quick Theo run to the butcher's shop and get the biggest turkey in the window." Mr Wenger said and Theo ran away as fast as  his little legs could carry him. Mr Wenger hastened down to the training complex where Pat Rice and all the boys lived, all of the boys were gathered in thee main hall as Mr Wenger made his entrance. They all looked up at him, bewildered, they never saw Mr Wenger at Christmas, normally Mr Rice did the best he could to create a festive mood singing carols with them. "Please don't cancel our Christmas sir." Said Tiny Jack forlornly. "Nonsense Tiny Jack!" Replied Mr Wenger, "I  have seen the error of my ways boys, this year we'll have the best Christmas ever!" Mr Wenger declared to a chorus of cheers from the boys. He then went on to offer Robin a new contract with his wages doubled and the new ping pong table for the comon room he'd been begging for for months, he told Park Chu-Young that he would finally play for 90 minutes in the Premier League, restored Tomas Rosicky to the starting eleven and ordered state of the art medical treatment for tiny Jack. Just as he finished his Christmas proclamations, Theo burst through the door with a massive Christmas turkey. "They sold the biggest one to a man in Sunderland but luckily they got this one from a farm in France!" Theo said happily. Arsene Wenger began to carve the turkey for the team's first and best Christmas dinner and tiny Jack cried glefully  "God Bless us every one!

An Arsenal Christmas Carol Part 4

Mr Wenger stared around him grumpily, he was getting mightily irritated with his sleep being interrupted by troublesome spirits. He settled down into his bed but his eventful night was not over yet. Once again the silence in his house was broken by an unearthly noise. A sound of clacking, almost like castanets in the corridor accompanied by a high-pitched yelping sound. Mr Wenger leapt out of his bed, incensed. "No more dutch ghosts, I can't take it aymore!" he yelled.

Arsenal Christmas Carol part 3

Mr Wenger looked all around him but the room was still and silent, slightly bewildered, he pulled his duvet up to his chin and leaned back on his pillows. At first he could not sleep, but slowly his eyelids began to grow heavy. Just as he dropped off into sleep, there came a scraping sound at the door, as if someone was scratching at its panels trying to get inside. Irritated at his sleep being interrupted once more, Mr Wenger got up and flung open the door. The corridor in front of him was empty. He slammed the door shut and turned back into his room. As he did so he let out a yelp of shock. Standing in front of him was the unmistakeable form of his team captain and top scorer Robin van Persie. Only something was different about him. Like Dennis before him, Robin was now silvery and translucent. "What the hell are you doing here?" demanded Mr Wenger. "I am the ghost of Christmas present," Robin said "So that's just how I roll." "But you're not dead." Mr Wenger said disagreeably. "I'm not that kind of ghost." Robin replied. "I am a spirit of the season, sent to teach you an important moral lesson and I've taken this form beecause its significant to you. Now I must show you something." He clicked his fingers and with a jolt they were transported from the house and into a freezing field next to an imposing grey building. Ghost Robin pointed to a wooden bench and some forlorn looking figures sitting on it. "Look Mr  Wenger, look how sad and bored Tomas, Andrei and Chu-Young are. Spare a thought for them sir." Mr Wenger looked closer and indeed there was Andrei Arshavin's chubby, child-like face, a face that seemed made for a happy expression, set in an unhappy little pout as he kicked his heels against the bench. There was Park Chu-Young, frustrated, desperate for a chance to prove himself, watching all the other new signings flourish ahead of him. There was Tomas, back to fitness but waiting for an opportunity, overlooked and underused. As Mr Wenger began to feel a sense of guilt and sadness, the ghost Robin took them inside the building. There was Bacary Sagna pining for his lost BFF Gael Clichy looking at pictures of happier times and there was poor tiny Jack hobbling about on his crutches, struggling around in his protective boot. "Look at these bleak times Mr Wenger. Your team is feeling a little sad sir, its a good job I'm around to lift the mood." Ghost Robin said with a little smile and with a wink he transported Arsene back to the silence of his room.......

A (very Arsenal) Christmas Carol part two

As Mr Wenger was drifting off to sleep, he heard a far off thudding sound. Dismissing it as either his irritating neighbours or the sounds of the old heating system in his house he turned over and closed his eyes again. Once more he heard a thudding sound, but louder, closer. Mr Wenger sat up in bed, grumbling to himself. "If that's UEFA at the door again you can go away, I've told you a hundred times, I wasn't breaking any rules!" He yelled, shaking his fist at his bedroom door. Just then, his bedroom door flew open bringing with it a blast of freezing cold air. Mr Wenger started, then beggan to shiver.

A Christmas Carol Part one

Christmas Eve, London.
Deep in wintry north London there lives a man named Arsene 'scrooge' Wenger, he works every day in his little office, overseeing his big project. Always he is working, day and night, on the training field or by the light of his little lamp. The work on his big project goes on and on, so that one day his ideas will change the world. But this project takes time, so much time because Mr Wenger guards his purse strings very carefully. He scrutinises every outgoing, saves his money scrupulously for the good of the project. There is no room for frivolity. And therefore there is no room for Christmas. And so this is what he tells his assistant. His long suffering assistant Pat Rice, a kindly twinkly Irishman. He informs Mr Wenger that once again it is Christmas and its customary to have a day off. "Christmas again Pat?" Mr Wenger asks irritably. "But if you have the day off, who will take training on Christmas day for we have a match on boxing day." A boxing day match, for his boys, his youthful football team, his callow and childish pride and joy. "Of course sir." Pat sighs. "But who will look after Tiny Jack?" Tiny Jack, the baby of the team, its fragile star in waiting, poor tiny Jack hobbling on his heavy crutches, suffering with a leg injury. "Oh alright then Pat. Have your Christmas day." Arsene grumbles. He heads home in the snow, back to his big, old empty house, "Humbug" He complains to himself, "What nonsense all this christmas business is..." he groans as he goes to bed......
To be continued..............

So the time had finally come: Grand Prix Final weekend. And where was I? Well Ruth you must have been at home glued to eurosport I hear you say. No I was on holiday in Bruges. But never fear readers my v+ box (the best invention ever) was on hand to capture the madness in all its glory. So I started out today with the men's free program. Oh what a contest.

Revival

Well, it seems the whole season wasn't over after a couple of months after all. The revival of our season continues apace. They were all waitting for it to shudder to a halt when we drew with Fulham but we're not readyy to lie down yet. Oh no. I'm honestly over the moon with the spirit the boys have shown to drag ouur season back kicking and screaming and put together a fantastic run of late. Yesterday's result was a rousing 4-0 defeat of Fulham. The list of goal scorers made for pleasing viewing too with goals coming from all over the park courtesy of super centre half Thomas Vermaelen, centre mid supremo Mikel Arteta, king of the wing Gervinho and of course the man himself. Our very own superhero. The unstoppable RvP. And we are now up to the heady heights of fifth in the table. Yes. You better be looking over your shoulder because we're catching up.
And what about in the league of champions? Well only one English has so far qualified for the knockout stages. The team in question? ARSENAL. Yes. YES. Working together to lead the way people. All of the boys should be very proud of that little fact.
Speaking of facts, I learned some very interesting ones about Andre Santos, a man who is very quickly becoming a cult hero amongst my friends and family. We love the guy. We learned that he drives a green and black smart car (the colours of his first team) is a big fan of Strictly Come Dancing and has apparently taught all of his teammates the dance to his favourite Brazilian record.
And a not so gentle reminder to comment and tweet your votes for my Christmas story, either the grinch or Christmas Carol. Do it! There's not long left to have your say.